Two weeks ago, I fell face-first into the hard tile bathroom floor, making no attempt to stop the fall. The emergency room doctors and the neurologist agreed that I was unconscious before I hit, hence the lack of injuries on my wrists–but the blow knocked me out for nearly five minutes. My husband said he thought I was dead. But, such was not the case … just laid out cold from the pain and shock of passing my first kidney stone. The ensuing two weeks, in the shadow of a traumatic brain injury, have been an exercise in patience–of which I am sadly lacking. Luckily I have a great sense of humor, and am happy to smile in the face of adversity while I get back to myself.
But it has shed a little light on recent teasing I’ve been getting my mom with this summer. Here’s the situation:
The alert tone on my iPhone e-mail and text messaging is a simple, clear, crisp ding! A pretty little tone that’s neither invasive, nor annoying. Early in June mom was riding with me in the car and the ding! sounded. She looked a little shocked at the sound, because I typically have my phone set to vibrate … but with my son on the go, I keep the sounds on in case he’s trying to reach me.
Mom said, “Did you hear that bell … what was it?”
And with the straightest, most earnest expression I could muster, I said, “Oh, that’s the sound of a good idea.”
And kept on driving. Never cracked a smile, never looked back at her to see if she was laughing. After a moment she said, “Oh. Cool!”
So I drove for another minute or so before I started laughing so hard that I nearly peed and then almost ran us off the road. Oh. My. God. It was so funny. My mother is so much fun on any given day, but her sweet, trusting self is almost too much sometimes. Holy shit, it was funny. Well, she laughed and agreed, “Good grief!” And then I told my husband and son, and we all thought it was the bees knees.
And then I fell. And my husband has teased me for two weeks, particularly when I can make it through a conversation without saying something totally non-sequitor. I’ve had to keep my cell phone in my pocket when I’m moving around the house, like a little beacon for him and a lifeline for me … lest I fall again. (PS. no more kidney stone = no more fainting from pain … but it’s taking the mister a little time to overcome the horror of finding me unconscious.) It’s a hot mess, I tell you.
Yesterday, the pretty little ding! sounded in my pocket and me and the boys snickered, as usual. My soul mate smiled and said, holding his finger up in a eureka! pose, “Oh! A good idea!”
We’ve decided as penance for being assholes about the ding!, that whenever it sounds we have to say an idea out loud. It’s easy to voice a quick idea on the fly. The challenge is in coming up with a good one …
Could you do it? A good idea on the fly?